"That is the way you are, always given
to silence. so I don't care anymore "
- jim carroll, The Narrows
our universe is a heavy metal rock god, i'm convinced of it. you may or may not be aware of my trembling fear of chainsaws. as in, the fight or flight response is thusly activated in the presence of its sound. i will run from a chainsaw. a far off leaf blower carried in through the wind midday gives me pause.
heavy metal rock gods love chainsaws.
i'm at a crossroads of really?! and wtf. i feel like im in some sort of hysterical, drug-fueled, lower-east side-deputant argument between andy warhol and edie sedgwick, throwing my fuck-me-pumps across a bedroom, and storming out barefooted into Manhattan snow insanity.
what is really important is for me to impart to my children that they not grown up to glamorize the bohemian lifestyle the way i did. bohemia is bullshit. its cool for a little bit, but its nowhere to make your home. some folks can do this, but unless you have a trust fund, i don't rightly recommend it. i love my life, but my heavy metal gods need a new power tool.
*snaps*
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